my last poast was a little vague. i gotta admit...i'm finding the whole idea of blogging kind of strange right now. i'm gonna give it a try. i guess i'm just having a hard time finding the words to express what i want to right now.
my life has changed so dramatically since my last postings. funny how life does that. in the blink of an eye...my entire life was rearranged. i still find it surprising some mornings when i wake up that this is my life. i'm having a hard time dealing with the ugly side of divorce. when the parents of children don't get along, it's the children who pay the consequences. and they didn't ask for any of it. my children are my everything. my everything. and to know that they are hurting because their mom and dad can't communicate in a healthy manner, that kills me. one thing i have learned through this is that, i am only responsible for my own reactions and actions. as long as i am accountable for myself, i'm doing all that i can.
i've spoken a lot about peace here on my blog. my search for it. my longing for it as more than a few fleeting moments. as a constant in my life. i'm still on that search. but learning to find it more and more in the daily. i'm getting better at realizing my own limitations and learning to let go of what i do not have control over. and that brings me peace. still not a constant. but i'll take it.
with the plethora of emotions i feel on a daily basis....i welcome those moments of peace.
so...life is very different. i am working full time. thankfully, i really enjoy my job. so the 40 plus work hours a week, they aren't so bad. i'm tired. but in a good way. work is good for the soul. and it's helping get me to where i need to be.
so yeah. i don't really know what else to write right now. i'm gonna take this blog thing slow. i'm out of practice. :) but i'll pop in from time to time. hopefully with some art to share soon!
much love and peace